I May End Up On The News Tonight

Not because I am going to do something spectacular, but because I am probably going to run some one off the road, or cause a scene in the grocery store or kill someone.

I quit smoking yesterday and I’ve been extremely crabby the last 2 days and I want to smoke. Everything is irritating and I’ve been snapping at almost everyone.

I actually yelled at my hair today. My bangs will not cooperate. They are doing this thing where they bend in the exact wrong place and if I run the flat iron through them they stick straight out instead of flat to my forehead. Not only that but they are refusing to pose a united front. They have divided themselves into 3 parts. My left side is the weird bendy side, the middle won’t do anything and the right wants to take a time machine back to the 80’s where big bangs were all the rage.

My belly button ring feels like it is trying to rip itself out of my skin. It hurts. What the hell is wrong with it? It’s not catching on anything, and it’s not infected so why all the pain. What do you have to mad about? Nothing, so knock it off.

The people I work with are making the art of chewing glass sound like a treat. Oh holy mother, if I have to hear the same two stories over and over again I may end up kicking someone in the ovaries.

It’s freezing cold where I work. It’s below 0 out side; you should crank the heat up a little. It’s not like this is the fist time in the history of Minnesota that it is below 0. Hello it’s winter. Below 0 is just part of it. Stop being a cheap ass, turn up the heat and keep us all warm so that we can actually do the work we are supposed to instead of trying to come up with new ways to keep warm. There is just no reason that I should have to wear a blanket at my desk.

And on the subject of below 0 weather, Hey MNDot did you know that when the sun shines just a little during the day it melts the road ice and then when the sun goes down, every thing freezes again? Salt the fucking roads please. I drove into a snow bank this morning because the road was glare ice and even though I was only going 5 mph when I started to break, my car still slid right into the snow. You want to know why there are so many accidents in the winter. It’s because you don’t care for the roads enough.

My eyelashes are stupid. I don’t know why, but the tops and bottoms keep sticking together and the right eye wont stay curled.

My feet are dry and they feel gross.

The menu at the café downstairs at work left off my favorite thing this month and I almost jumped over the counter and strangled someone when I saw it wasn’t there.

This was all my sister in laws idea. We were going to quit together and keep each other motivated at work, but you know what, she’s not even here! This was not a brilliant idea. How are we going to encourage each other if we are not together?

Yep. I’m in a really bad mood. I want just one, just one to take the edge off. Smoking for me wasn’t about the nicotine or the hand to mouth thing. It was the escape. At work I could escape and go outside to smoke and get away from work. At home it was the break I’d take from whatever was bugging me whether it was homework, cleaning, ZAG or Monkey. I was able to stop and take a break and it was something that I had to do outside so there was no chance of my break being interrupted. Now I have nothing and I think that is the reason why I hate everything so much right now.